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Feminizing Yourself Through Diet And Exercise

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Posted with permission from Lola

Diet & How to Get Rid of Unwanted Muscle

Many of you are concerned about your masculine proportions (big arms/shoulders/upper back), and would like a way to feminize your body naturally. Here's the simplest way to resolve this issue: diet

The diet will consist of:

A good, reliable multivitamin & multimineral. Most of you won't have a balanced diet so this will be necessary.

Flaxseed/fish oil. Capsules preferably, no more than 6-7 grams/day

Protein: about 0.5 grams/kg of weight. [1kg=2.2 lbs]

Carbohydrates: You want these low. A high carbohydrate intake makes your body release tons of insulin, which is the one of the hormones the body uses to store fat and build muscle. Most people do well around 40% of daily calories on carbs.

Fat: Fats will fill the remaining calories you need to complete your intake. Make sure most of these are healthy fats, but some of these are "unhealthy" (I hate this term since cholesterol is necessary for some important functions).

Calories: This will depend on your size, weight and level of activity. Here's a calculator. Fill in the numbers and find how much you burn a day, then take away as many as possible WITHOUT GOING BELOW YOUR BMR (This will slow your metabolism while you're dieting and you don't want this. This is the main cause of the yo-yo effect)

Calculate your daily intake here:


From the number you obtain, take as much as you want WITHOUT GOING BELOW YOUR BMR calories (upper right corner on that screen).

And don't start with a monstrous deficit of say, 800 kcal (more than enough to burn muscle). Start with a small deficit of, say, 100 kcal, and build to the total deficit in 2 weeks in small increments. This way your body will be able to adapt better to it.

Normal diets don't tell you to take out as many calories (they usually go on the 500 kcal range), but normal diets are made to preserve your muscle mass, which is what we don't want. Oh, and by normal diets I mean good ones, not the shittier attacks against health performed by women magazines under names like "the watermelon diet" or "the X calories diet". A diet should always be tailored to the dieter's daily calorie expenditure and lifestyle.

General tips:

-AVOID red meat: it increases your testosterone, and we don't want that.

-Protein in vegetables usually won't be absorbed by the body (it's incomplete and has low bio-availability) so be careful with soy as a protein source.

- You want your proteins low, but you still want protein: You want to destroy muscle, but you want to preserve vital organs, right? Don't worry, your body is smart. Most protein will go to repair organs. Don't neglect your protein intake, though.

- Not all muscles are bad: you want a tasty and meaty bottom, right? There's a way to preserve it: exercise those muscles while you diet. This way your body will think those muscles are still necessary and will make an effort to preserve them.

- On the other side, try to use the muscles you don't want as little as you can. If your body doesn't use them enough, they will become the primary source of protein for any other uses (and thus, they will start to shrink).

- Be careful with how fat you are, you don't want any health problems, so check your bf% (body fat %) with a caliper (you can buy these online for around 5 dollars) or try one of those bio-impedance machines, but they're a little inaccurate, and you should measure your fat always in the same conditions with those ( i.e.: always after having had the same meals and having drunk the same amount of water) so results are stable and reliable.

- AND NEVER go below 7% of your mass in fat. Yes, this means you may have to gain some weight to lose some muscle after.

 - Drink lots of water - at least 3 liters a day. Most people go around with liquid retention, and ironically this is because they don't drink enough (if the body doesn't get enough water, it starts to store it, since it "thinks" you're in a dry season - blame evolution). This water tip can, and usually will, slim your legs and belly faster than diet.

- The final tip is this, after you've dieted the muscle out of you, you'll be confronted with your true body shape, the structure your bones, proportions and internal organs give to your body. Once you know this, it will inform the styles of clothes you should wear to accentuate your look.

Those are general guidelines. Everyone is different, and this is not dogma. Do whatever you want or need, but do it wisely and take my words with some caution.

Creating and Shaping Your Ass

The female ass is bigger than the male ass, as it serves as a fat storage zone, while in males the belly is the main fat storage zone. You don't want to develop a strong, thick ass, but rather a big juicy one - an ass that contains a lot of fluid mass rather than solid muscle. That's achieved with what it's called "resistance training" (training your muscles to be resistant to long efforts, but not to develop a big strength). This is for a physiological reason too long to discuss here. Basically, resistance training makes your muscles big by increasing the volume of water they contain (water that contains the ingredients to make them resistant, like glycogen/fuel), but not the amount of "actual muscle fiber" in them.

The meat and potatoes - here they come:

-Lunges, don't use weights (that'll develop the muscles on your torso, and you don't want this to happen) Start with 3x10- build up to 3x30x for each leg as time passes. Don't keep the leg straight at the end of the movement. The knee should always be bent (otherwise you'll work out your torso again).

-Kickbacks. Here you can use weights (if you can go to a gym). Do 3x8-12reps per leg if using weights. Build from 3x10 to 3x30 per leg if not using weights.

***Don't do more than 30 reps - It wont make much of a difference.

-Between the sets (the 3 in the "3x30") wait between 1 and 1:30 minutes. THIS IS IMPORTANT. The aim is to deplete the glycogen stores of the muscle so it'll develop bigger "storage" (which is the water I told you about before), thus increasing the volume of the muscles.

-For the reps (each movement of the exercise) focus on doing them in 1 second up, pause 1 second, 1 second down. That'll burn and you won't be able to do all the sets the first day. Also, don't rush.

Running on an inclined surface, (i.e. like you were running to the top of a hill). Most treadmills give you the option to incline the running surface.

Do those exercises 2-3 times a week, and always give your body AT LEAST 1 day off, to rest and grow. Stay away from SQUATS AND DEADLIFTS (they work your lower back, giving you a manly frame).

Be belted - that means to have a slim waist, and that's mainly diet. There's no muscle giving you a slim waist, in fact, developing core/torso/waist muscles will make your waist bigger.

Only abs would be advisable, and even then, you don't want them too big. If you've gotta do abs, STAY AWAY FROM CRUNCHES (develops core). LYING LEG RAISES ARE A BETTER OPTION

If not, you should try using a corset. It's been used for decades, it works nicely and it is sexy to wear.

To grow tits you'll need mainly hormones. Yet many women use exercise to make their pectoral muscles bigger so their tits stand up a little bit more. They’re called "flys", and won't develop your arms (many other pec exercises do), and you should use light weights, 3x 8-12 reps, 3 times a week

For your muscles to grow you'll have to eat a surplus. Yes, you have to overeat a little bit (just don't pig out) around 300-500 cals more than necessary. You'll see results after the first couple weeks. Grow to the desired size and then diet the fat out. The total process shouldn't be more than a couple of months, and then you'll be able to tell the difference. Take pictures.

While dieting, you HAVE to do your exercises, and keep the weights/repetitions you were doing or your muscles will go away. After you diet (you'll lose all your belly and have a nice wasp waist around 10%bf) you might see that you've lost some fat of your ass and it doesn't look big and juicy enough. No problem. Keep exercising and eating normally and it will grow over time (just not as fast as with an excess of calories).

On a side note, when you diet you'll lose some volume on your muscles, that's water volume and you will recover it the 1st week after the diet ends, and your ass will recover it's juicy size. Don't be disappointed if your ass looks smaller when you diet: you'll get it back.

If you can afford a gym, there are plenty of machines/exercises to work your glutes, and then a different and more effective routine can be made (glute isolator and roman chair ham raises being some of the best) but it depends on the equipment at your gym.

This section will deal with the gluteus medius, and we will end here a basic ass training

The gluteus medius is important for many functions, but it's got a trick: it can make your hips look wider (that's why you'll never see a macho man doing the exercises. Big hips usually are considered unaesthetic in traditional hetero-normative beauty standards for males.

It also helps to give your ass a rounder look (but only if you got some fat) as it's right under one of the main fat deposits of the human body. As I said before, the female body uses this area as a fat storage area. By developing the gluteus medius you can "fake" that your body is also storing fat here, and thus make it look more feminine.

Enough. let's go to the routine. I'll implement also the exercises listed above so here you'll get a consistent routine to make your ass rounder, bigger and juicier.

3 days a week exercising; one day exercise, the other off. If you don't rest, muscles won't grow and your ass will stay the same, or even worse, shrink.

AxAxAxx where A equals training days and x equals rest days. Discipline and consistency are the key.

Without a gym (calisthenics)

-lunges: build from 1x10 to3x30 per leg.

-kickbacks: build from 1x10 to 3x30 per leg.

-bridges: 1x10/15 to 3x10/15 are enough. You can add some weight (don't go too heavy) on your belly after some weeks doing these to increase intensity. A bag full of anything will do well. Be careful! Google on how to do them and don't add too much weight.

-floor hip abductions: from 1x10 to 3x30 x leg.

-Isometric hip abductions*:3 x leg.


-Stand to the side of a sturdy chair or table for support. Your left leg should be next to the back of the chair.

Raise your right leg directly out to the side as high as you can (don't overdo this, you don't want to get injured because of your lack of flexibility, when it starts to hurt, stop right there, lower your leg a little and there's the point).

Hold your leg for 10-30 seconds. At the beginning it will be difficult. You'll get better at it very soon, though.

And that's it! Remember, 1:30 of rest between sets. For most exercises, other than the isometric hip abductions, lifting time should be one second, keep the position for another, lower the weight in another second and other second in the starting position (4 seconds x repetition).


For your muscles to grow you must eat more calories than you consume, if you get too fat, diet WHILE EXERCISING, if you get too thin (can be a problem when you develop your buttocks since you'll be able to see some definition of the muscle heads), eat more. If everything goes right, your body will put some fat over the muscles, thus finishing the goal of making your butt look more feminine.

You need protein, to maintain your health! Where this protein comes from, is not important, it can be meat or fish (just don't take it from vegetables)

Also keep in mind that in 1 month you may see some changes, but a body is not built in such a short time. You can easily eliminate your liquid retention (between 0 and 5 kgs of mass) by drinking 3-4 ltrs of water a day (but don't overdo this - drinking 10 ltrs a day won't make the liquid retention go faster, and it can be unhealthy) which will slim you a bit, then you can lose something around 200-500 gm of muscle with such a deficit in a month if you're slim (now go to the supermarket and ask for 500 gm of lean chicken breast, imagine that on your shoulders, you'll see how much volume that is!) or more if you are muscular.

With protein, you can be a little creative. 2 medium eggs contain about 11 grams of protein (with the yolk), so you can eat 6 eggs (yolk included, the eggs/cholesterol shit is a myth. Google it). An egg a meal sounds like a better option than a burger a day right? Also 30-40 gm of protein is about 1 ltr of milk (which also counts as water since is mostly water with nutrients!). 4 glasses of milk a day with some cookies sounds good, right ? (yes you can actually lose weight on milk and cookies!!). Also, you can eat 2 sardines or so a day, just chop them and put 1/4 of the chopped fish on each of every 4 meals, almost as a dressing. You'll get to taste of animal protein and stay in your numbers.


Oh, and don't count proteins in vegetables as proteins, your body doesn't absorb them.

About counting calories, my best tip is this: buy a food scale, and start doing your calculations. The scale will cost you, but it will give you a service way beyond the purchase price. AND DON'T GO CHEAP, THE FOOD SCALE IS ONE OF YOUR BEST FRIENDS!

Also don't eat fruit: fructose most of the time goes directly into fat, and if it doesn’t it’s because it’s filling your glucose reserves, thus preventing you from entering in a catabolic state, thus preventing you from burning muscle.

Dieting sucks, but that's life! Just remember that all this suffering is going to pay off! Also remember, a month is not that much time for this kind of change. If you keep at it for 4-6 months then you'll be able to see some real change.

Here's a final tip: run, do some cardio with your legs. This way you'll remake your body to spare some of the muscle on the legs, so that the muscle loss will be concentrated more on the upper body (shoulders, arms...)

Some clarifications:

Gaining muscle: eat 100-500 kcal more than you spend a day + 2 grams of protein/ kg of body weight, more if you need to get your fat back. Of course, exercise or you won't gain any muscle. Gaining strength is a signal you're doing it right.

Losing muscle: eat 30% less than the kcals you spend a day and 0.5 gm of protein/kg of bodyweight. Don't do exercise on those zones you want to lose, keep exercising the zones you want to keep. Losing strength is a signal this is working.

What this means:

-If you start fat: lose your muscle by dieting, then build whatever you want to build when bulking (the getting fatter phase).

-If your start in the middle (aka: skinnyfat): diet and then build muscle.

-If you start skinny: be honest with yourself. Are you skinny, but have some muscle you don't want? Maybe you can diet it away. If you're really skinny, chances are that you don't have much muscle, and if you diet you'll get sick, so you'll probably have to bulk ,to build muscle wherever it’s needed.

A key component to how your body looks is how your fat is distributed.

If you have a gut, I'd say you should diet first. Don't try to do abs, that doesn't solve any gut problem, only eliminating the fat eliminates the gut.

To eliminate muscle, it's all been said above. Follow the instructions carefully and invest in a reliable food scale, those are the main tips.

Working out while dieting won't make your muscles grow, since the body just won’t add muscle if it isn't getting enough food (this is because your body has come from billions of years of evolution, so any reduced food intake is interpreted as a famine, and a famine is counterproductive to growth - that would expend more energy and you're starving!).

Take pics of your ass weekly and see how it is progressing, if you see you're losing too much of it (losing a bit is absolutely normal, though) you may actually stop dieting, get some fat and some muscle in the lower body and then diet again to lose that nasty muscle in your upper body. That'll solve the problem of your excess muscle while sparing lower a bit more, but the gut will stay there and that'll take a long long time (many months), and, finally you might need to sacrifice some of your ass to get rid of the gut.

Sorry for the bad news. On the plus side, your ass cannot disappear completely, the main structure is there. And still, there's hope, after you've got rid of the muscle and the belly you can tone and bulk your ass and thighs again. In fact, it's easy to make them big and juicy, but I don't know if you'll preserve your actual fat distribution or if your body will make up a new one, since your fat distribution is the result of the hormonal balance you had when you gained it, and nobody knows the hormonal balance you'll have in the next months, when you lose and gain the weight again. I can almost guarantee that your legs would look better thanks to the added muscle, but about your ass I just don't know.

Another option might be to diet the gut out on a high protein diet, that will spare ALL the muscles, then in a short time you can try to diet your upper body muscles out while exercising in an attempt to spare your lower body. This might be the best option, and you should accept that maybe you'll lose a bit of the femininity of your ass, but still, a gut is even less feminine. Your ass can be rebuilt in almost no time, the only thing at stake is your fat distribution, but since you already need to cut the fat, there's not much more we can do.

If you have a gut, you should diet first. Don't try to do abs, that doesn't solve any gut problem, only eliminating the fat eliminates the gut.

To eliminate muscle, follow the instructions carefully and invest on a reliable food scale, those are the main tips.

Less muscle in the arms is always a good idea.

To avoid using the core while squatting, the key is to stabilize your body BEFORE the core has to do it. This is done by starting in a VERY STABLE posture, my tips are:

1. Yes, use your heels, use all your feet surface.

2. Feet shouldn't be parallel, but to make a 90º angle. This helps you distribute the strength in 2 axes so it's a more stable position.

3. Find a surface, a chair, a door, a box, a wardrobe, a bed, a something, a whatever, but you should be able to grasp well the aiding surface.

4. Muscle mind connection: focus yourself on using only the muscles you want

5 If you feel the muscles implied are on the back, it's not as bad as if they were in the belly, focus on PUSHING THE FLOOR DOWNWARDS instead of your body upwards, and use the strength in your butt.

For those of you who want more legs, maybe leg extensions will help with your quadriceps.

3x30-50, you know the drill. tempo, rest and all other shit is all explained above.

IMPORTANT: ONE LEG AT A TIME SO YOU DON'T USE YOUR ABS (doing it with both legs at the same time involves belly muscles)

Sorry to say this, but be realistic. a "toned up body" in a male is almost synonymous with a body where you can actually see muscle definition (which means no fat and some muscle), which is not what you see in women.

Diet has been discussed above extensively, there are 2 goals you can have: gaining muscle in key areas (while accepting some fat gain) and losing muscle (or keeping it) while losing fat (bulk and cut cycles, for people who know that is).

If you've got belly and feel like you're fat, the best is to start a serious cut, and then see where you might need some muscle and work that. But first cut, in my opinion.

Also, you must have something clear in your mind: a masculine body doesn't look like a feminine one, and vice versa. Males have a more developed upper body, while females have a more developed lower body. Think about it and understand you can't have it all... sorry...

And control how much carbs you're eating: Skim milk can be a trap (pun not intended, lol). Also try to drop milk for a couple of days and see if your belly goes down, chances are your intestines are inflamed because of milk. Also, milk counts as water so you don't need to drink as much water a day.

That's it, girls - if read all the way to the end, well done!

I hope it gives you a more precise idea of what you can and can't do, if you're serious and put your heart into it.


Lola xox

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